I have been listening to James Blunt's "Your Beautiful" and didn't get the meaning of this song/video, until I watched it a couple times. I didn't realize he was committing suicide over his lack of trying to make contact with a beautiful woman who was with another man on the subway, but he "had a plan". What was his plan? To talk to her? Get rid of the boyfriend? What? Was his plan to commit suicide because he'd rather die than not have his beautiful girl, which may or may not be his ex-girlfriend? There has to be more to it. I do understand that a beautiful face you can never forget.
He didn't carry out his plan in talking to her and obviously violence was not an option. It appears self-doubt got the better of him. He states in his song, the original lyrics that she looked at him, and she could see from his face that he was FUCKING HIGH, not flying high. So Fucking high could mean heroin? If she was an ex girlfriend, maybe she dumped him because he's a drug addict? Now she moved on and he blew it. If she wasn't, maybe he thinks she is too beautiful for him and wouldn't want to mess with someone who is a drug addicted loser, or maybe fucking high could mean something entirely different, like mental illness? He's so full of self doubt and feels inferior that he has to go off into seclusion, in the rain and snow, take off his shirt and all his belongings and lays them neatly in a row before him. This is a Japanese tradition in removing ones's shoes and contents of their clothing before jumping to your death from a great height. So he has some sense of spirituality.
He also touches all the objects, except for the one item to the left of his shoes. This is his suicidal note. He doubts he'll see her again. Maybe the box is an engagement ring that he couldn't touch it? There are a bunch of seagulls circling over him which represent buzzards. So he decides to jump into the freezing ocean off the high mountain because he must face the truth, that he'll never be with her. So fucking sad.
I watched this video about a dozen times last night and I cried like a little baby. I cried for him and I cried for what could have been if only he had the self confidence to approach her. It's the small things that make the difference in your life. It's better to have a shot in the dark than to die knowing you never even tried. For all the hopefuls out there, maybe it wasn't a suicide, but a water cleansing, water represents purity and cleansing and rebirth so maybe he is trying to explain to her that at the end, he jumps into the water to be reborn? No, I know it's suicide. I tried to see it other ways to help me sleep better last night. He died :-( I will say this again, a beautiful face you can never forget! I know this from experience.
No comments:
Post a Comment